The Fertility Statue

There is a fertility statue that has passed from Alwine to Alwine for generations now. It’s become a family joke in a way. Can’t get pregnant? Send her the fertility statue! What? She still doesn’t have a baby? Give her the statue even if she does not want to have a baby yet.

It all started roughly about 45 years ago. My Aunt Lorraine entered a unique gift shop and found an unusual wooden statue of a old man holding a fishing pole with a fish on the end of it. When she asked the shopkeeper about it he said it was a potent fertility statue. Well, at this my Aunt laughed with glee and promptly bought it as a joke for her mother.

Not long after having the statue her mother was pregnant with Lorraine’s youngest sister. Her mother threw the statue at her head screaming “Get this out of my house.” While my aunt had it in her house she had one of her three children.

My Aunt Cheryl and Uncle Mike had tried for years to have children. They went to fertility doctors and specialists. They tried everything they could think of. Enter Aunt Lorraine with the fisherman statue. Aunt Cheryl had a boy and a girl not far apart. Then, just in time for the first two to hit toddler years, she had twins. According to my mother Aunt Cheryl was being wheeled into the hospital for an emergency c-section and was completely passed out when the doctor asked my Uncle Mike if Cheryl still wanted her tubes tied. At this she woke, sat straight up, yelled “Yes!” and than passed out again. After the twins were born the statue was again thrown at my Aunt’s head.

This went on for years until it was given officially back to my Aunt who boxed him up and wrote all over the box “fertility god. DO NOT TOUCH.” About 5 years ago my sister Sam was upset because the doctor had informed her she was not going to have children. His exact words were it would take a miracle. At this my aunt took out the box from her closet and gave it to me to give to my sister with the explicit instructions I was not to touch the statue.

Sam laughed when I gave it to her and graciously set the statue up.  It was less than a year when she found out she was pregnant with her beautiful daughter Gracie. So, I’ve heard the stories and seen it in action, but when Sam handed me the statue I could not help but laugh. Not because of the reason you would think. I laughed because it was a very large hint my family wants me to have a baby soon.  Funnily enough my Aunt Lorraine texted me shortly after that saying “While you are at your sisters grab that statue.”

When I came back home I told my husband to look in the bag that housed the statue. He took one look and quickly handed it back to me. I laughed asking if he wanted to touch it. His response was “Not until we have better health insurance.” My husband may believe in the statue more than me!

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